THOSE WHO SUFFER LOVE
I lost all my sweetness somewhere. Look who never learned any coping skills that hurt her sensibly.
Because of my parent's divorce, and me moving away and deciding to drop out of college and leave the country, the people I grew up with can no longer remember how to speak to me. I might as well be crawling, bleeding out of a flaming car wreck in front of them, trying to talk about the weather. Take me out to dinner, take me out to movies, you can't even look at me.
I was standing there in high heels and faux fur, red lips trying to talk about sins and mary have mercy and Johnny Thunders, you know, and you're wearing sweat shirts and tennis shoes- There's just not any point anymore.
Every single second of my life is recorded onto paper and the film cameras are following me somewhere I am alone and the soundtrack is blaring- I learned how to make anything sound like a fabulous adventure, but nothing's even remotely dramatic but me. You can tell me how badly you ruined everything now like you'll tell me later about right now, but I'm still sort of screaming. I didn't forgive you, I just don't care anymore.