THOSE WHO SUFFER LOVE
I couldn't sleep...
And, come on, how could anyone, really?
All you'd have to do is look outside to get a full blown reminder of what you miss everytime you fall asleep.
It's like a reminder as to....
I don't know. It feels weird to write this.
There's a full moon tonight. It's so bright you'd think it was daytime around it.
And since I'm by the ocean and, the sky is dark...So I get stars and moon.
And then there's my fucking neighbor's porch light.
It's so bright it lights up my whole bedroom. And she never turns it off. EVER. What a waste of money.
Anwyay.
I guess you could just call me another stupid kid hanging out her bedroom window to look at the moon in the middle of the night.
It's sounds cliche. But it's very rewarding.
Like just being there by yourself and knowing that you are the only one on your stupid block in your tiny town in the middle of suburbia where no one ever amounts to anything and nothing is ever relevant to the rest of the world, has the power to make you feel more...alive than anything your waking, comprehnsible life could ever do.
It's nice.
I was going to walk down the block or something to go see if I could get a better view, but I didn't think that midnight was really a great time to test whether or not I could clime back through my window....Maybe I'll try tomorrow.
This all feels....Surreal, I suppose. And I couldn't tell you why.
And cliche. Very, very cliche.
But in a good way.
It's nights like these, you could say, that make me wonder why anyone at all would want to die.
Which says more than I ever could.