THOSE WHO SUFFER LOVE
Hey...I'm back! Well...obviously.
I tried desperately to read everyone's diary....and failed quite dismally....Oh well.
Anyway. As promised, I have now returned from an absolutely miserable three week trip (with my family) to England and Ireland.....Yeah, it sucked.
But, nevermind.
Through careful observation, this is my complied list of things discovered about the English/Irish music scene. And lackthereof. I realize that I'm probably wrong on half of these, but, fuck. I'm just "another stupid American". So kill me.
So. Here goes. (Ahem)
THINGS I LEARNED. (about music and pop culture....sort of).
1. Nobody cares about punk. Seriously. Nobody. And if they do...Then they must live underground. The only people I saw who even vaguely resembled anything I could say was "punk" were two teenagers...From America....So there you go. But, hey, maybe they all just live where I wasn't. How's that for bad luck?
2. The "Metal" section of record stores does not mean it has metal in it. In fact, "metal" sections don't really have a lot of metal in them. It just means the kind of music that they-who-are-unaware-of-things-outside-of-MtV would never listen to. (i.e. Punk, ska, hardcore, emo, and if you're lucky- some metal).
3. The Casualties, The Exploited, GBH, and Nekromantix don't exist....They just....don't. Trust me.
4. The Distillers, Minor Threat, The Ramones and The Sex Pistols are in the Rock and Pop section. Thursday in the Get Up Kids are in Metal....The Confusion ensues.
5. Hardly anyone likes the Misfits. But even at the smallest record store (no, not the uber-commercial ones) has at least four different Millencolin CDs in stock....More confision.....I don't know anyone besides me and Miss Uber Emo who like Millencolin....
6. Despite the lack of Metal CDs in stores, the metalhead population is up about twelve thousand percent from here (Amanda, you'd just love it....Especially in Ireland. Because not only are most of the guys hot and metalheads....They are hot Irish metalheads...It's funny)....
7. When you are in heavily populated areas on the weekends, you are destined to see lots of kids in Marilyn Manson/ Slipknot/ Korn merch....Especially Slipknot.....From reading English magazines, I'm beginning to think that these Brits have quite a Joey Jordison fetish...It's also funny.
8. Same goes for old people. It's just weird to see really old guys with white hair and bald spots wearing Killswitch Engage shirts...It just is.
9. If you are a boy between twelve and sixteen, you like Metallica.....I swear to fucking god. I have never seen so many people in Metallica shirts.
10. Putting a "Hey Ho Let's Go" pin on your two hundred pound blazer makes you a rebel. Ditto for Clash shirts.....Aggravating.
11. As far as I can see, bands like Good Charlotte and Simple Plan are still considered vaguley "underground" by major populus. They're even in the Metal section....I weep for you, England.
12. But, that being as it is, you don't see fucking thirteen year olds ever fucking place you go in their stupid brand new lowtops and stud belts calling themselves "PuNk RaWkeRs"....Yeah, that was really refreshing.
13. In fact, this whole damn "punk fashion movement" that we in the land governed by idiots have...Which I find rather amusung because England is where punk came from....More or less.....
14. If you are a young-and-fashionable male, you must have a....(dare I say it?)....fauxhawk....It was painful....More weeping for England and their fauxhawk-ers. Burn in hell, you idiots.
15. Old ladies dye their hair crayola rainbow colors. On purpose.
16. Everyone has peircings...It's weird. And kinda gross after awhile.
17. The whole rest of the population is listening to the American pop-music of 2000...It's new there.
18. McFly is the British equivelent of Good Charlotte...It's, to say the least, disgusting. They all look like fucking Abercrombie and Fitch pretty-boys. (Fuck you McFly).
19. On English satellite TV, they have thirteen music channels....And they ALL suck....But you can watch a lot of Daria, so it's okay.
20. Kerrang! is lame. And Alternative Press does not exist. (More and more weeping).
So, I think I'll leave it off at that. Because I sincerely doubt that most of you even cared about half of that. Sigh.
I have to go eat some more. I think it's about nine in the evening my time. Er, England's time. Because I guess I'm on California time now.
And thus the confusion ensued.